"He doesn't want to just forgive you, he wants to rip out all of that (stubbornness, insecurities, greed, lust, anger, anxiety, whatever it is you struggle with) out of you and change who you are."
let it happen people.
About a week ago, I hit bottom, actually no. I thought I did. I couldn't control my emotions or thoughts. But as the week went on and I pressed to You what seemed like a huge scary roller coaster now merely seems like a ripple from a pebble falling into a stream. A stream of Your love. Its funny now as I'm thinking about it. This trial is so small compared to the larger picture. This little pebble, the problem. Once it fell into Your love it was swallowed up and You took care of it. Yes, it's still at the bottom moving around but You are in control. Whether the pebble keeps up with the stream or stops, everything is going to be fine. This is all part of Your plan, part of my story. I couldn't happier. Thank you.
I will admit though, there are times I fear the future. But why? You have everything in control with a plan better than anything I could imagine. As this week goes on Father, remind me of that. Make me believe that. It's odd how I can be told something a million times but until I rest in the thought, I don't actually believe it. I pray that You help me rest in the fact that; You love me, You have time for me, everything will be fine and my heart will change the way You want it to (As long as I let it.).
Father, help keep my mind in peace through out this week. I was told once, "90% of our thoughts are about yesterday or tomorrow." Which yesterday has passed and You have tomorrow under control. Help me live in the moment this week. Help me live to make my story beautiful by loving others around me. Not by planning for the perfect relationship which leads to the perfect family, the perfect house, the perfect kids, the prefect job. No. I've over it. I want my mind to be set on today. The joys of today. The little acts of love happening today. I 'm tired of spending so much time worrying! I ask that You help me refocus my thoughts and love others.
Lord, change me.
in Jesus name.